Legs 11

So, it feels like I'm all legs.

Eleven bloody legs, and not a damn one of them works properly. (Goddamit I'm an octopi officionado +3 legged crab witch.)
Another day, another tentacle for a leg. What am I talking about?! No idea. I have no idea because I have no cognitive function, or what I do have is limited to imaginations which are in my head. I have lost the ability to make conscious decisions, reasoned arguments and see eye to eye with anyone up to and including myself.

I'll meet you in the park, if I get there before you I'll write my name on the wall in chalk, if you get there before me, rub it out.

I can't walk well (2 falls in one day- typical) and I can't talk well, call me and we'll discuss.

I hope you are well enough with whatever has been thrown at you, I'll see you on the flip side.
Maybe! Stay well xx

An new update (An Actual)

Bloody buggeration, its Sprummer. (No Spring this year in Scotland just Winter then...'Sprummer') bloody fucking 'Spring'.
No beech leaves to pick till 4 weeks ago, and elderflower is only JUST out today. This is diabolical. Summer has gone tits up and next thing you know it'll be Autinter. (Yes yes keep up with my almalgamous ways, do)

The poor bees...oh poor lovely Bees.....they've been going mental- 2 days ago was the highest pollen count this year so far, Bees were at it- collecting pollen like it was going out of fashion, and Wasps...well Wasps were angry on it.
(I got stung surprise surprise, Wasp and I, well we had 'words') he was apologetic and humbly buzzed off before coming back a couple of hours later to get me right between the eyes.
"2 for the price of one bitch! I get you!"
I must stress that Wasp is not ebil, Wasp is just Wasp. I didn't squash him, i simply went my way and him, his. (the little bastard of the Hymenoptera order, if I see him again, there'll be murders *for 'murders' see "harsh words". heheh)

I'm on a forage and making of many things week, on the work side I have a massive task ahead with a capital application, and in my personal life I am having a tattoo (sleeve starter) in a few weeks from now....think Brambly Hedge and that's what you'll find- joy!
Hope you are making hay while the sun shines (and its gone in again, oop its out, umph its gone in again.....fuck a duck!

Onwards people, onwards :) x

The Masterplan

Yesterday I created "Marj's Masterplan" for 2013; a huge pictorial poster of my stages of professional development, artworks, music, foraging (in no particular order) and the steps I'll be making to ensure that 2013 is filled to the brim with new and exciting opportunities........

I've divided this year into 4, let's face it when did months and not seasons become so important? Only recently I think.
I remember as a child my life was divided between Winter-Spring-Summer-Autumn. And so it will be again.... I think we sometimes need reminding that we are part of nature, and not separate from it. And so, part of the Masterplan is being formulated around this very thing as we speak, I'm currently on "Winter" and here is what I have so far.....

Winter:
Time to plan and think creatively. Move house. Find a new job (something more intrinsic) build solidarity, reconnect with rocks, trees, green therapies, sculpture (my god, has it been that long?)

I went to Crail on a fossil investigation last week, dug out my geology hammer and reminded myself that life that is everywhere, and is more important than life in 'the office' or elsewhere within the confines of four walls. Look at this........this made me realise, the world is out there, I'd just become wrapped in superficiality (work/money/power) fuck that. No more.

Above: This is a 350m year old carboniferous tree, probably sheared by a glacier. I am in awe of this remarkable discovery. My hammer is staying out, my spirit is lifted. I have opened my boxes of fossil discoveries (ichthyosaur tooth embedded in a rock still my favourite, then the hadrosaur poo) what joy rocks bring. Winter is a time for rocks. And planning. I am a great planner, I had forgotten this too.

Where have I been?

Found some blue lias in Fife, spoke with my friend Emil (stone carver/artist/all round brilliant good egg: http://flavors.me/emilmaxthompson) about possible excavation with potential of carvings/modellings/using for pottery projects (hmm....an Elgin Marble style frieze with embedded fossilised plant potential methinks....) Lordy, I am such a geek.

Spring:

Beech Leaf Noyau will be made (what's that then?) It's a beech leaf liqueur (I'd forgotten about beech leaves, how stupid of me) which is a bit like Sake, just sweeter..... Spring will be all about nature; rocks and trees. Nettles, plantain, ransoms, mycelium trails.
I will be the queen of nature again- fact.

And that's as far as I've got, but, it's a massive start, I know one thing that this year will bring and that's all part of my Masterplan, it's all about nature and rocks. I love geology (Geology rocks! Sorry...couldn't help myself...) and as well as art which always is on my agenda, nature has moved up the charts to number 2.

I'm so excited I could burst!
It's all down the the Masterplan...........have you got a plan? Do you know where you're going? And are we there yet?

And so running out of ideas and making a parody, this is what 2013 and my Masterplan is all about:

Simple, yet effective!
Hooray..........................................................................!

My Brain Hamster

Well that was fun.......

I've just come home from MRI number 4 which was a delight!

Not only do you get to go and lie in a tube for about 3/4 of an hour, but you're also asked to "keep still please," about 10 times (which for a fidget-pants is joy) and you also get the bonus of CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK BRRRRRRRR zzzzziiiip! CLANG - in no particular sequence or rhythm that you can follow or keep time with... and then there's the ecstasy of being injected with blue dye to light you up like a Christmas tree, and to finish it all off and put the bloody fairy on top of the glowing orb of twinkle, is the marvellous news that,
"We're pleased to announce that yes Ms Davies, there is something in there.... "

It was so much fun, but what truly made Clank-fest great was that one of my friends Carole came with me, which was so very sweet of her I could burst - thank you Carole xx - I took her for lunch to show my appreciation of something which can't fully be expressed with an Arboath Smokie, but she liked it and that's the main thing....joy

So, now here I am now at home feeling tired and a bit frazzled, but in no way unhappy with my news....I'm delighted to report that contrary to medical science and former projected illness that I don't have MS.
Ha! Oh if only that were the case....pah....of course I have it, but, I also now know the face of my oppressor, this my friends is what my MS looks like......(yours of course will look different, but ultimately it's gonna be a beastie)

This is the shape of my MS.
This is "Ms Marjolie" my Brain Hamster on her Wheel of Death.........

"squeak squeak squeak....weeeeeeeeeeee!" 
*in an almost silent but deafening sort of way*

Tomorrow I will call some exterminators in- Rentokil might be helpful here *gets out the yellow-pages and thumbs through* Tell you what, I'll be a monkeys uncle if I can't get this little blighter eliminated before it uses my ear as a shit-box.

Heheh....

And that, my friends, is just the way I roll. MS Scans are nothing compared to the ferocious tenacity of Ms Marjolie the Brain Hamster.......another day another turn of the rusty wheel...... x

Further to "How are you?" the end of questioning begins

Follow up to my last post "How are you?"

Excerpt of conversation starters from Monday:

(Q: Questionee. A: My answer.)


Q: "Hi, how are you?" (asked while not looking at me)
A: "YES, and then what?"
Q: "...What?"
A: "Yes, and what comes next...?"
Q: "....Um, err....how are you feeling I suppose?"

(meh, marginally better but still not meaningful, nor correct- for " I suppose " see "I don't actually give a shit about you or how you're 'feeling' " My answer -

A: "Through a series of nerve-endings which send electrical impulses to my brain."

*questionee immediately shuts the fuck up.*

"How are you?" I think will not be asked again anytime soon.
But, I won't bank on it.